Your body. Pleasured. Interested?
I have been on a deep relationship with my body for about the last 6 years. (But who’s kidding who – we have all been on a journey with our bodies our whole lives.)
My intention in giving my body attention morphed from being able to accept and be happy with my body, to actually loving my body, to feeling free in my body, to, finally, finding out all of the pleasure my body had stored within her. The journey became about unwrapping all of her treasures. How did I know there were treasures there? I found that whenever I followed her lead, there was a gift. Every time I listened to her, I felt better. Every time I gave her what she wanted, I was filled with self-acceptance and love. She never steered me wrong.
I can now say that I have a pleasure-filled body. She is no longer depleted. She is no longer dry. Or numb. Or disconnected. She is happy. She is thriving. She is fully alive. She is emotionally cleansed and healthy. She hums. She purrs. She growls. She wants. She is AWAKE.
And, by golly, she still has more to give. More to receive. More to teach me.
And what I have discovered is that the more I listen to my body and give her what she wants – the food she wants, the sleep she wants, the calm she wants, the touch she wants, the movement she wants, the pleasure she wants, the PERMISSION she wants, the more she teaches me. About how much pleasure she can really hold. (It’s a lot; more than I could have imagined). About how much joy is inside her. (As well as how much sadness, anger, fierceness, power, radiance, frustration, irritation, joy, surrender, softness, sensuality, sexuality, playfulness…)
I am in awe of her.
The more I live inside my body, the more curious I am about how most of us seem to be living. If you look around you, I’m guessing you will see a lot of stillness. We stand in lines. We sit in chairs. We stand and talk at parties. We sit on couches. We sit on our phones. We sit in our cars.
We are mostly still.
And when we do move, it’s either the hard work of a workout, fast walking to get somewhere or something else that is work. There is not a lot of pleasurable movement for us.
Even the last few conferences and events I have been to that are women-only events have been experiences of the brain. We sat. We talked. We thought. We sat some more.
It is as if we are just brains. No body. Or, more likely, that we are way more comfortable living in the brain and our thoughts and way less comfortable in our bodies so we just ignore them and carry on as if they don’t really exist.
I don’t believe that we are designed to sit and be still. I don’t believe that we will ever shine our brightest light through our brains alone.
And yet we continue to try to get everything we want through our brains; we think, we analyze, we read, we watch, we go over and over something in our heads, we justify, we judge, we deny, we criticize, we try to use our brains to do what our bodies are meant to do.
Which is make us feel whole. Make us feel alive. Worthy. Powerful. Beautiful. Open. Peaceful.
Make us feel at home. Perfect the way we are…with all of our lightness and joy and all of our darkness and pain.
How is your body connection these days? When did you last dance? By yourself or with your kids or with your girlfriends? When did you last have drops of sweating running down your spine in joy? When did you last feel a pleasurable touch on your skin? When did you last stretch slowly and feel the melting away of tension in your neck and upper back? When did you last groan or moan or make a sound as you felt your body open and release?
I believe that women are made to be physically embodied. Our brains are incredibly smart and gifted but when we live in our brains, they can turn against us. We can be devoured by patterns, fear, self-doubt, critical voices, resistance…and all of that can shut down our bodies. We constrict. We tighten. We tense. We shut down.
We shut off all of this life force, this realness, this aliveness, this vibrancy, this power, this joy, this pleasure, this fullness of life in our bodies.
Tell me, what are you feeling in your body as you read this? What is your brain saying to you? What is your body saying to you?
By the way, if you find it is weird that I refer to the body as “she”, ask yourself – have your ever felt divided between what your brain told you and what your gut told you? Have you ever held back from a body impulse (moving in a certain way, reaching out for something) because of what your brain was telling you? Has your mouth ever said, “Yes” as your body screamed “No”?
That is the disconnect. And that is why it is accurate and helpful to distinguish between language of the body and the brain.
So, here is what I’m really excited about. I’m releasing a brand-new program called “The Pleasured Body“.
I’m going to be releasing details about “The Pleasured Body” in the next week.
It is designed to bring a woman and her body back together.
If this is something that you think you are really keen on, please let me know and I’ll make sure you get first-notice on when the program is released.
In the meantime, here is a really easy way to begin to hear the voice of your body.
Give her time.
When you are making a decision, from what to eat for lunch to whether to say “yes” to that job or that invitation or that request, give yourself a few minutes or a few hours to decide. Don’t give your answer right away. Sit with it. See how feeling “yes” to the question feels like in your body. Does it make your body feel open, expansive, excited, peaceful, relaxed? Does it make your shoulders drop, skin tingle (or however “yes” feels like in your body)? Or does it make your body constrict? Does your body tighten, pull in, instinctively protect itself by closing down?
This is a process. This is a skill and a tool to develop. Don’t be impatient. If you can remember all of the years most of us have been using only our brains to make decisions (and not trusting our own sense of rightness), then you will realize that it will take time to unlearn that and to relearn to listen to your own sense and TRUST YOURSELF.
But when we learn to trust ourselves and to listen to our bodies and to follow our pleasure, EVERYTHING CHANGES.
Every. Thing. Changes.
Yes, you DO have that much power inside of you.
Again, if you want to make sure that you hear about this offer first, respond to this email and let me know.
And finally, allow your body to feel good. Allow her to feel pleasure. Answer her call for what she needs to feel good. Allow yourself to RECEIVE.
In the comments below, I’d love to know about what this post makes you think of. Is your body pleasured right now?