Ever feel like you are on fast-forward all the time? Isn’t it exhausting? Rushing. Moving. Doing. Planning. Multi-tasking. Pushing. Organizing. Finishing. Starting.
We have stumbled into an age that values movement above stillness, quantity over quality and busyness over relaxation. In fact, to say to the world that we are successful, we shout “I’m SO busy!”, as if that is the best gauge of our value in the world.
Of course, we all know that this pace of life comes with a price. Exhaustion. Depletion. No fun. The feeling that life is passing us by and that each day melts into the next. Time flies when you run everywhere. When life gets less busy, I’ll……(Cosmic joke here; LIFE will never get less busy but WE can get less busy!)
I believe that women have a slower and more sensual pace naturally. I think when we rush, we lose our connection with ourselves, our feminine power and our lust for life.
Many women who join the Juicy Women Revolution want to slow down. Maybe they have a lot of demands on them – from children, to house, to supporting husbands and partners, to taking care of sick parents – or maybe they feel that their inner pace is too fast. They rush everywhere. They talk fast. They think fast.
They yearn to slow down.
Here’s what I do to slow down;
1) I don’t multi-task. (And please know that “don’t” means that I usually don’t but just like you, I am a fully alive, Redneck Woman and not a robot so…..things happen.) I do one thing at a time. There is something about concentrating on one task that allows for space in my life. Space to think. To concentrate on doing that one thing well. Enjoying it. The good feeling that comes from completing it. This has been my number one way to slow down. For a peak into my life, my Tuesdays and Thursdays are at home with two kids. I used to multi-task during those days; I had expectations of things I would get done while taking care of two cute little rats, cooking meals, cleaning up the kitchen and taking care of myself. Every day, I ended up frustrated (because of course, I hadn’t done anything well), exhausted (spending a whole day juggling tasks is not relaxing) and NOT HAPPY (nothing I had done that day made me feel good). So I decided that Tuesdays and Thursdays would be my “happy house” days. I am now mummy, home-maker, cookie-maker and happy little wifey. I have no items to be accomplished on these days except for everyone arriving at the end of the day having been fed and still alive.
2) I have stopped filling up “extra” time. Have you ever done this? You somehow have 30 minutes between things and you think, “I could do some grocery shopping now or drop the books off at the library. Then if I hurry, I can fill the car up with gas, call so-and-so because I owe her a call and check my email. If I have any extra time, I can start packing up my winter clothes, make that gluten-free bread and finally start my MBA.” Exhausting. When faced with 30 minutes between things, I choose not to fill it up. I grab a coffee and go for a walk. Sit in a cafe and read a book. Or pull over on a side street and have a nap. (Yup, that’s me…). We can CHOOSE to slow down. But it is a choice.
3) Breathing saves my life. This sounds like an obvious one but when my heart is pounding and my pulse is racing and my brain is going a million miles a minute, breathing in for 4 counts and out for 4 counts is the only thing that saves me.
4) I say “no” like a champion. I say “no” to things I don’t want to do. And I say “no” to things I do want to do but my wise woman inside knows is too much for me to take on. I believe that for most women, saying “no” is a total aphrodisiac.
5) I’ve started to listen to full albums. (Or I’m Going Old School.) Has anyone heard of “The Black Keys”? Yes, I know. I am just discovering them. Love them. I have been listening to their albums (for free at your local library branch) in the car and when I wash dishes. There is something about listening to a full album that allows me to sink into an experience. Someone has thought about how to present those songs in that order just for me. There is no thinking about the next song while one is still playing. No frantically searching for what I’m going to listen to next. No distracted moments as I hear the opening few seconds of a song and immediately think about another song I want to hear instead. Yum, yum, gimme some.
6) I live in the Juicy Woman Revolution. You don’t know slow until you are in a dark warm room lit by candles, there’s a slight scent of incense in the air and you are on your back, moving to a deliciously slow song that allows you to leave the world for a moment and sink into your raw, lustful creature. It’s mmmmmmm-good.
So, here’s to some delicious, slow moments this week. Allow yourself to choose space.