By after-glow, I mean that super-delicious feeling that comes after you’ve done something you are proud of. A first. Or a really good. Or just something you dived into, even though you were terrified. Or anything that you did (or that was done to you….mmmm….) that made you. feel. good.
I’ve found that I can either cut the legs off my after-glow so it quickly disappears (what a waste) or I can find ways to extend it and to allow myself to enjoy the positivity as much as possible in my body, heart and mind.
Last year, I had my first official talk about the Juicy Woman Revolution. I decided to talk about Becoming a Well-Nourished Woman, because I love that work for myself and I think it’s a really powerful and effective tool for women to break through a lot of negative shit.
So, I walked into a room full of women waiting to hear from me. I stuck to my script. I improvised. I did some movement work and some talk. It went well. And most importantly, I had done it.
My first JWR talk in front of people.
Afterwards, I got back in my car and started the drive home. And this is what happened.
- did they like it?
- did they get it?
- I don’t think they liked it
- Nobody said anything
- I should have done that part first
- I wish I hadn’t said that
- Oh my god, did they think it was revolutionary or were they looking at me, writing grocery lists in their heads?
And I noticed that it was, somehow, my default to not dwell on the positive (You Did It!) but to immediately jump into where I could have done it better.
No, darlings. Absolutely no. I cannot and will not abide it.
So, I waved my magic wand (keeping most of my eyes on the road, of course) and made a deliberate choice to completely change what my default was by creating a new ritual.
In other words, Hell No, Not Up In Here!
So, instead, I spent the drive home thinking about all of the positive things that happened. And feeling proud of myself. I committed to enjoying my success (You Did It!) for one week. I ordered flowers to be delivered (even though my florist lives, literally, 3 minutes from my house) with a card that said “Congratulations!” (and other mushy stuff).
And then, when I had thoroughly enjoyed my after-glow, I went over the evening and thought about what I had learned and what I might do differently next time.
This is also what I do now after my retreats or events. I don’t read any of the feedback or go over any notes for a few days – until I am fully saturated with all of the good stuff that happened.
So, I am throwing down the gauntlet. What have you done recently (or are doing now) that you can use as practice in extending your after-glow? What ways can you find to completely and utterly enjoy the success of something you have done? How can you allow yourself a few days of just being absolutely thrilled with yourself? No criticisms. No judgements. No should have done this instead. No negative mind chatter.
In the comments below, I’d love to hear your thoughts on how you celebrate (or not) the good things you’ve done…or any ideas you have to extend the sacred after-glow.