I was sent an article a few days ago by some friends. It was titled “Our ‘mommy’ problem” by Heather Havrilesky and it talked about how being a “mommy” can be the defining element of a woman. (To read the full article, click here).
As a mother, I thought bummer. And I started to think about how unfair it was for others to see me as just a mother. And I also realized that sometimes I let that part of my life define me too. Oops.
Then I started to realize that it is not just moms who get defined by a role. It’s all of us.
We can be defined by our jobs. Works in marketing. Entrepreneur. At home mom. Working mom. Struggling entrepreneur. Wanting-to-be-an-entrepreneur. Hating the job. Loving the job. Looking for a job. Constantly at the job.
We can be defined by our relationship status. Single. Still single. Dating. Just married. Divorced. Separated. Recovering.
We can be defined by our patterns. Our past mistakes. What people think we’re like. (People who don’t really know us.)
It’s so easy to define ourselves by our roles. Our jobs.
So limiting. So boring. So not-the-full-story.
What we DO is not what we ARE. I am, by genetics, a mother, daughter and sister. I am, legally, a wife. I am, by profession, an entrepreneur.
These are just things I do. Not who I am. It’s not the jobs that light me on fire. It’s who I am.
The article fired me up so much that I immediately put pen to paper to figure out what I was, if not just wife, mother and entrepreneur.
Here’s what I wrote:
I am a creator. Dancer. Dreamer. Builder. Thinker. Philosopher. Warrior. Learner. Try-er. Comedian. Performer. Adventurer. Rebel. Hot-blooded woman. Motivator. Leader. Cry-er. Artist. Partier. Transformer. Fantasizer. Writer. Ecstasy-seeker.
I gotta tell you – just writing this list made me realize that I am so much more than my roles. And sometimes, even I forget that.
Do this exercise for yourself. It’s so much fun and very powerfully inspiring. I think it is hugely important that we see ourselves as the WOMEN we are, not the roles we play.
So, gorgeous gal, who are YOU?!